You know when you are already having a rough day and a series of events take place that make you snap in two?
Well I was having one of those days/weeks. The founders of the ministry when away to a wedding for half of the week, one staff member went home to have a surgery and another is house sitting for the week. That leaves the rest to me and my roommate, and we can sure feel it. Not only are we still doing our normal work load, we are trying to juggle everyone else’s too.
Then I went to class on Tuesday and one of my students really began to open up to me. She was very vulnerable, with tears in her eyes as she was burning herself out to have it not be enough. I love that these women are beginning to open up to be, it is a sign that the trust is there; yet it is hard to hear how these beautiful women are being abused. Many do not have anyone to share with, so I get the honor of being that person.
Furthermore, after a long morning on Thursday and 30 minutes before I head out to teach for 5 hours (computer and English classes), I discovered that there must have been a large surge of energy that fried my personal computer and TV. That meant that I could not take my laptop to teach the computer course that afternoon.
This was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I know in the long run it really is not a big issue and that they are just things, it was just the culmination of being tired, working hard and having the emotional hurt from what my students have been sharing with me.
But I had no time to break down as I had a full afternoon of teaching in store for me. Class was great that afternoon. I had a great day teaching but also connecting on a personal level with my student. As we were walking to her 3rd job, she held my hand the entire way (a sign of friendship). My heart was full of joy. Then as I was on the bus, a woman that I have seen many times before shared to everyone on the bus that ‘She is my friend. She is my friend.” She bought me some very overpriced peanuts and eventually I was able to sit down next to her and catch up with my friend. I tried to pay her back, but she said “I am your mom. You do not have to pay me.” Again, more joy filled my heart.
That night, since I had no computer, I had plenty of time just to get away and be with the Lord. It as beautiful. Then I found as I was learning some more Thai, that JOY is pronounced ‘pit dee’ which sounds pretty similar to ‘pity’. I reflected back to my time when I wanted to throw a pity party, and the lord threw a better one for me, one of joy.
Then we ended the night having communion with the team and it was sweet, innocent and unique as the bread was literally cut in the shape of little men.