Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Do we really know what we are singing? Seriously, take a look at these lyrics to a popular (or once popular-it is hard to tell now that I am out of the loop) song. Give me your eyes-meaning, God give me your eyes. Let me see what you see. Everything that I daily overlook, allow me to see just this once. Allow me to see the corruption. Allow me to see the pain. Allow me to see the injustice. Allow me to see…
I started to think about these simple but deep lyrics on my way home from teaching English. As you may know, I teach women who are trapped in a horribly corrupt cycle of human trafficking. They tell me detail stories of how they are abused very frequently. It is hard to hear, but I choose to love them through it all. It is beyond hard to see women abused. It cuts deep, it hurts and I am not even the one being hit.
There is one woman whom I have written about before. Today was her last day at English Class. My worst nightmare for her is coming true… One of her ‘faithful’ customers is purchasing her for 3 months (minimum) and taking her to his home country. She continues to clear out the stuff from her room, and today she came bearing even more gifts. A purse, bag, 4 pairs of shoes (they know I only have 1 pair), snack food, fruit, and more. We played ‘Go Fish’ like we normally do in class (with the vocab I am currently teaching them) and we ended the class with pictures.
It still is surreal to me that she is leaving. I think it would not hurt as much knowing that what she is walking into is new and good (like a child moving out of the house for the first time and starting a life at college), but it just plain and simple: it hurts. I do not understand; which never helps. I know I will miss her dearly. I pray that she remains safe. I know she knows that I love her and pray for her daily.
On my walk home, as I was thinking about the lyrics above; I began to want to take back some of those words that were sung. (I did, and then I didn’t). I know this is just a taste of what God feels all the time. He sees far more than I ever have and His heart breaks for injustice. It is also a blessing to be able to see what He see and have my heart break as His would break. But it hurts…is this what they mean when they say ‘love hurts’? I don’t know.
What I do know is one of my best friends is leaving to do what she thinks she needs to do for her family. That she will do whatever is necessary to provide for them, even to the point of extreme abuse.
I do not know of a ‘proper way’ to respond. I have not read any manuals or guides on how to respond in situations like this.
I cry (a lot). I pray (a lot). From time to time, I write out what I feel/think…which is very scrambled, but sometimes it helps. Then I repeat the process.